It was wig shopping Monday today….My cousin, Kirsten, suggested that we go and have a look at a few options and styles before I spent a small fortune on having a wig made up. Kirsten has been cutting, colouring and styling my hair for over 10 years now, a little more regularly over the last few as although I am pretty young in oncology terms – in hair years, I’ve been needing her help more often to keep the grey away! She is the only person I trust with my hair, so who better to help me buy my new fake hair.
My trust issues with “hairdressers” may or may not be traced back to when I was in junior school and desperately trying to grow my hair. I did not have what you would call, lovely glossy locks growing up, it was more like a birds nest, no joke – I have the photos to prove it! Finally after two years I managed to get it to a reasonable length and I asked my sister to straighten it a little (okay, I admit, that may have been my first mistake!). She proceeded to trim a bit from the one side, then the other and then again from each side until I started getting a little suspicious (sadly, I have always been a little bit slow!) and managed to get to the mirror to see that she had “straightened” at least a year and a half’s growth away!
I knew Kirsten would be honest and I trusted her opinion to be my wig co-finder. My hair is quite long at the moment and the plan for the day was for her to cut it short before my treatment starts later this week. The therory behind this is that when my hair starts falling out, it won’t be as traumatic – at least that’s what all the chemotherapy / cancer websites advise. So this morning I straightened my hair for the last time, mentally preparing myself for a shorter style. Just to let you know, my hair has been short on only two occasions since I was about 15 years old. My hair is my security blanket and each time I have cut it, I have instantly regretted it and spent the next year willing it to grow!
The first thing she said when she got here was, “Damn, I forgot my scissors, OH MY WORD, the RELIEF! I should have known by my reaction, wig shopping was not going to go so well…
We happily set off joking about how cool it would be to get a different wig for each day and to try new colours and styles. So we pull in to Kinkys Hair Salon at Selgro Centre, ok so not the best address in town but, wow, quite a selection of fake hair!
We looked at their 100% human hair option and the synthetic ones. I tried a few on and immediately felt like a brunette version of Goldilocks: too short, too dark, too fake, too Billy Rae Cyrus! I mean, I may be bald soon, but I do have standards!
I hated them all! In fact, that wasn’t actually true, I hated myself in them, I hated that I even had to be there making these decisions and more than that, I hated that I will soon be losing another big part of ME.
It did get better…. We went out for lunch!
“Courage does not always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, ‘I will try again tomorrow.” Mary Anne Radmacher
“Knights and Lords have their swords, girls – but one of a Woman’s most effective weapons is her hair”. Angela Ewell Hunt
“Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald.” Navjot Singh Sidhu
“We’re all born bald, baby”. Telly Savalas
“People always ask me how long it takes to do my hair. I don’t know, I’m never there.” Dolly Parton