An Unexpected Graduation

Today I got some unexpected news…

Pete and I had an 11 am appointment with the Dent Doctor for our scheduled 3 weekly chemo follow up.  This meant I couldn’t have chemo until after we saw him (blood results dependent).  This unfortunately also meant a very long day at the Cancer centre.  Not really a fun way to spend a Friday but considering I had only 2 more chemos to go, I was in a VERY accepting mood!   

The Dent Doctor greeted us with ” can you believe it’s almost over”?  I’m not sure who beamed the brightest, me or Pete!

 He asked how I was doing, was I having any problems…. ?  I told him other than the fact seeing him and having chemo was keeping me from the Oscar trial channel (I am sad to say I am an addict!), I was still feeling quite strong.  I also mentioned I had been having some issues with my fingers and showed him my very sad looking fingernails with their darkened, painful nail beds and how the numbness in my fingers and toes (and even the tip of my tongue) was always worse the day after chemo but that it would improve over the week…  Fingers

My fingers were still feeling rather “tingly”, but it was all okay, I had already pricked them with a pin to make sure I could still feel them!  He got really quiet, started reading through his notes and then abruptly shut my file declaring I was done with chemo!   Whaaat????

“Are you serious? Are you sure?” were the first words out of my mouth!  I was so sure he would suggest that we take a few weeks break from chemo before continuing – this had happened to friend of mine.

He said when the nails show signs of lifting and the numbness started becomming a real problem the risk of permanent damage at my age, was frankly just not worth the two remaining treatments.  I was…. surprised, delighted, thrilled, terrified, thrilled, terrified, thrilled…..did I mention thrilled?!

We still had to discuss the future,  the next step,  the next visit to the plastic surgeon, radiation….WHATEVER…at that moment it all seemed inconsequential and totally do-able!

Pete and I were still in shock when we left his office and we didn’t quite know if we were about to laugh or cry!  

I couldn’t wait to tell the Sisters that I wouldn’t be seeing them for treatment afterall!  There were hugs and well wishes all around!

So as I sit here, on my lazy boy chair- at home rather than at the cancer centre, I’m still taking it all in…. I know there is still quite a journey ahead.  But today I celebrate another graduation, another HUGE milestone and the ending of a tough 5 and a half month long life lesson.

0 chemos to go! 🙂

 

“Go back?” he thought. “No good at all! Go sideways? Impossible! Go forward? Only thing to do! On we go!” So up he got, and trotted along with his little sword held in front of him and one hand feeling the wall, and his heart all of a patter and a pitter.” J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit

“It is always important to know when something has reached its end. Closing circles, shutting doors, finishing chapters, it doesn’t matter what we call it; what matters is to leave in the past those moments in life that are over.”  Paulo Coelho

“I thought following a straight road would lead me right to my destination. Like the road would just take me there because I was following all the rules. And if the road curved, I couldn’t be sure about where I was going. But look where it got me. Maybe it’s time for a detour.” Susane Colasanti

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6 thoughts on “An Unexpected Graduation

  1. Awesome news my friend!!! U guys must be sooo Over the Moon 🙂 Just too happy for you! Wishing you all the best for what’s left of your treatment journey. Hope you have a wonderful wkend.. Take care.. Lotsa love xx

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  2. What a great Friday it turned out to be, I didn’t need my kindle (which was forgotten at home, must have been a sign) for the hours of waiting while the chemo drips went it… Surprised, unprepared and speechless were pretty much how I felt when the Dent doctor gave us the great news. Amazing how the mind works, although I’d mentally prepared myself for another 2 rounds – there was an amazing sense of relief that set on once I’d processed the great news, I did wake up this morning and wonder whether yesterday was just a dream but fortunately not…

    Janine, you’ve been amazing as you have tackled this and I’m so grateful that you have some time to recover and rest… Yes, you still get to do that, who is going to keep Shal and I up to date on the Oscar trial if you don’t??? There are still some hurdles ahead but we’re ticking them off, one at a time and making fantastic progress. Thank you for fighting such a brave battle – you are amazing… Love you xxx

    “Hero’s take journeys, confront dragons, and discover the treasure of their true selves.”
    – Carol Pearson –

    “Butterflies don’t know the color of their wings, but the human eyes know how beautiful it is. Likewise, you don’t now how good you are, but others can see that you are special.”
    – Anon –

    “Courage is finding the inner strength and bravery required when confronting danger, difficulty, or opposition. Courage is the energy current behind all great actions and the spark that ignites the initial baby steps of growth. It resides deep within each of us, ready to be accessed in those moments when you need to forge ahead or break through seemingly insurmountable barriers. It is the intangible force that propels you forward on your journey.”
    – C Carter – Scott –

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    • Thank you Pete! You know how tough this chapter has been and how easy it would have been for me to just curl up and feel sorry for myself. But you have not allowed me to wallow for too long and that has made all the difference. Going to the Cancer centre each week has kept my own journey in perspective. I know this has been tougher on you than you will ever let me know, but I want you to know how much I have relied on your strength and love. It’s not over but we’ll get there xxx

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  3. “Each of us, as we journey through life, has the opportunity to find and to give his or her unique gift. Whether this gift is quiet or small in the eyes of the world does not matter at all–not at all; it is through the finding and the giving that we may come to know the joy that lies at the center of both the dark times and the light.”

    —Helen M. Luke

    So very happy that the chemo chapter is now closed! And that you have some recovery time before the next hurdle. Stay strong you are an inspiration to so many! xxx

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