Yesterday saw me heading up the hill armed with my MRI scans to see Dr B about those annoying nodules! Was so nice to also have some company – thank you Gerry!
Once again I was just blown away by Dr B’ kindness and care. She greeted me with a smile and a ruffle of my hair, saying how good my hair was looking. I guess she was really just being rather nice as it really was looking particularly wild! Can’t seem to keep the wavy excuses for curls under control these days!
So, long story short….she also seemed to think they were enlarged fat cells \ left over breast tissue which may have become infected or swollen due to hormonal changes\ scar tissue behaving badly…..but no way of really telling without whipping the suckers out.
My heart sank…..
She must have sensed my reluctance at the mention of surgery as she also added that it may be more beneficial to leave them for a few weeks to see if they changed or actually got the hint that they were not welcome and simply disappeared. I certainly perked up at that option.
BUT she said she would certainly understand if my instincts were screaming for me not to ignore them, especially considering what I had already been through with nasty lumps and the fear of nasty lumps returning…. she would also support THAT decision 100% and would remove them asap if I felt so inclined!
In a way it was good to hear her say that as despite my complete fear of being involved in any further surgical procedures was the complete fear of leaving them in.
I have had lumps checked and scanned since I was in my very early 20’s and had been advised to leave them as they were harmless…. until they wern’t. So trusting my own instincts is something I’M not 100% sure about!
BUT (and as always, here it is!!) I needed to understand that there was always a chance of her perforating the implant if she cut them out. EISH!
BUT she was fairly sure with what she felt she could get them out ok, under local anaesthetic in her surgery….. GULP!
BUT that she would have to probably have to cut a little wider than my current scar – BUT probably not too much more EISH and Double Gulp!
So for now I’ve opted to take the waiting route……for now at least I’m comfortable with that…….I think…. ?
“I have been and still am a seeker, but I have ceased to question stars and books; I have begun to listen to the teaching my blood whispers to me.” Hermann Hesse
“Regular people have such a hard time listening to the low hum of instinct.” Suzanne Palmieri