So this morning I woke up feeling a bit sad for myself and a bit fed up. My lymph drainage seems to have decided to take an early Christmas break leaving the swollen, spongy tissue feeling rather sore and pretty freaky looking.
The pec muscles on my right side are bunched really tightly and will not move an inch, despite my best massaging efforts. As a result my radiated bionic boob (a fantastic term stolen from a fellow blogger and breast cancer survivor) is once again sitting much higher than the non-radiated bionic boob. Making it extremely difficult to find clothes to mask this freakishness. So a trip to Gillian will be required this week, I just hope she can see me!
Just to add to all the freakishness, my feet and hands are continually swollen at the moment. My knees, hips and fingers are aching, not sure what’s up with that! And all in all I feel at least 30years older than I am, and pretty fed up!
It probably didn’t help that I also went swimwear shopping last week where my options were somewhat limited by my continued expanding frame and trying to find something that wouldn’t show off the really attractive pocket of lymph running down my right side.
I also ended up visiting my GP for a pap smear, yip the fun just never stops! Not only did I have to have the pap done, but blood had to be taken to check ovarian tumour markers. So even without the tamoxifen, those will have to be closely monitored! *sigh* And even though I’m sure they will all be fine, there is still that annoying voice somewhere in the back of my mind whispering….but what if it’s not?
So yes, this morning I woke up just knowing it was going to be a special shade of a Blue Monday!
Well, that is until I switched on my Blackberry and saw that my very first Facebook update was post about my friend Fynn.
Now I know many would say that I cannot call a person who is less than a 3rd of my age, living thousands of kilometres away and someone whom I have never even met, my friend… Ok so technically speaking that may be true. But Fynn is the kind of person I really would like to call my friend, so that should count for something, right?
My friend Fynn lives on another continent with his mum, dad and little sister. He is 8 years old and earlier this year he was diagnosed with a brain tumour.
Over eight months ago he had an 8 hour surgical procedure to remove enough of the tumour to give him (in the words of his doctor) “a fighting chance”. Unfortunately that same life preserving surgery changed his life drastically and he is having to learn to walk and talk again along with presenting other severe challenges. Fynn has already completed one full round of chemo and is currently on his 2nd. Today he completes his 4th chemo treatment of this cycle with another 5 to go.
My friend Fynn has a truly inspirational family and I read his Mom and Dad’s Facebook posts every week to keep myself updated with his progress. But it’s not just his medical progress which is documented; they also share in such a sincere and heartfelt way the realities of what they, as a family, deal with on a daily basis. The impossible choices, the frustrations the horrors, the tears and the triumphs.
Often just days after chemo his mom will write that he’s determined to go back to school when she would far rather him be resting. He’s a very determined young man, is my friend Fynn.
This morning’s update was that his bloods were high enough to give him chemo despite him not feeling very strong. His dosage has been halved as last week they picked up that he’s suffered hearing damage due to the chemo. Life sure has not been easy for my friend Fynn.
So as I and the rest of his family and friends wait to hear how he is doing after today’s chemo; I urge to you to think of my friend Fynn, and keep him in your hearts. And when like me, you wake on a Monday feeling fed up with how unfair life is. Whether you are worried about bills piling up, how you are going to afford to pay your kids tuition, what to cook for dinner, how you are ever going to get your boobs level or just grumpy with your boss/ wife/ husband/ mother/ dog/ cat – take a few minutes and think about my friend Fynn and his mum, dad and little sister. And instead of listing all the wrongs in your life, hug those PEOPLE you love and who you are fortunate enough to share your life with – they are really the only “things” that should matter – the rest…….the rest is just stuff.
OKAY: you don’t HAVE to hug your boss 🙂
So today, for my friend Fynn, I am not going to try and find quotes to express how I feel – I am going to share a song…
This is for you Fynn, my hero and my friend….